Tag Archives: Wooden

A Walk Long Remembered

by Woody

A very personal anniversary arrives next week, not of my wedding, but rather a milestone marking 35 years to the morning when I walked with John Wooden for the first time.

March 31, 1987 – Tuesday then, this year Thursday – was a day so special I marked it in my datebook of birthdays and anniversaries to remember. It proved to be an occasion that changed my life for Coach became my friend and mentor, and later a great-grandfather figure to my two children. I pinch myself still for such grand luck.

Coach and me during one of many magical visits.

In the long span since, I have written more columns on Wooden than on anyone else, as well as a book; when I give guest talks he is the person most often asked about, even now 12 years after his death at age 99; so here is a stroll down memory lane.

After interviewing Coach following a lecture he gave, he invited me to join him on his daily four-mile walk. Aware of his maxim, “Be on time whenever time is involved,” I left Santa Maria when the stars were still out and arrived in Encino with nearly an hour to spare.

At the appointed time, seven o’clock sharp, I nervously pressed the buzzer outside the condominium’s entrance. Coach, true to his code, was ready and waiting and immediately came out. After warm pleasantries on a cool and dewy Southern California spring morning, we set forth around Mister Wooden’s Neighborhood.

For the first mile or two, I peppered Coach with basketball questions but he then turned the tables and asked about my life. He was delighted to learn I was going to become a father in August and asked when was the due date.

“The eighth,” I replied and Coach stopped cold, his eyes visibly misting up. That was his and Nell’s wedding anniversary, he shared. High school sweethearts, they had been married 53 years before her death to cancer two years before our walk.

On that magical morning, I was 26 and Coach was 76 – the exact age at which my paternal grandfather died two decades earlier. Indeed, sitting in Coach’s living room after breakfast I felt like I was not with a living legend so much as visiting with what I fondly remembered my beloved grandfather to be like.

Like Wooden, my Grandpa Ansel was raised on a Midwestern farm – in Ohio rather than Indiana. Like Wooden, Grandpa enjoyed Shakespeare greatly and also similarly favored “Hamlet.” Like Wooden, Grandpa loved poetry and wrote verse. And like Wooden, Grandpa had once been a schoolteacher, albeit for only a few years in order to earn tuition for medical school.

Moreover, Grandpa’s familiar reminder to me, “If something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right,” surely echoed Coach’s oft-repeated aphorism, “If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?” Similarly, Grandpa’s “If you don’t learn anything today it will be a wasted day” dovetailed perfectly with Coach’s “Learn as if you were to live forever; live as if you were to die tomorrow.”

John Muir, reflecting on meeting – and walking with – Ralph Waldo Emerson in the Yosemite Valley, wrote: “Emerson was the most serene, majestic, sequoia-like soul I ever met. His smile was as sweet and calm as morning light on mountains. There was a wonderful charm in his presence; his smile, serene eye, his voice, his manner, were all sensed at once by everybody. A tremendous sincerity was his.”

Such is how I felt about John Wooden during our first walk and visit – and feel so still.

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Personalized Signed copies of WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and  “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” are available at WoodyWoodburn.com

 

Mourning On A Gloomy Morning

by Woody

My favorite Wooden-ism, as I call John Wooden’s maxims, is “Make each day your masterpiece.”

This past Tuesday never had a chance to be a masterpiece. It was a canvas painted with ugly graffiti; a day where the Southern California sunshine seemed gloomy; a masterpiece ruined because Nan Wooden, the late legendary coach’s daughter, passed away in the morning at age 87 of natural causes.

The news squeezed my heart so hard it felt bruised and brought me to tears. Losing a friend is never easy, even one you have never met. Indeed, all the times I visited Coach in his home during our two-decade friendship, Nan never happened to be present.

That is not entirely accurate. Her presence was always felt through photos on display and our conversations.

Coach John Wooden and daughter Nan at at UCLA basketball game.

When my daughter Dallas was born – coincidentally, and sentimentally for Coach, her due date was his and Nell’s wedding anniversary – he shared how over-the-moon he had been when Nan was born and that I was likewise sure to be wrapped around my own little girl’s finger.

Two years later when my son arrived, Coach pointed out that we had both been blessed with “one of each” and in the same order. After that, I always paired Nan with Dallas, his Jim with my Greg, and I think Coach did likewise.

When Coach passed away a decade ago, I sent Nan a condolence card care of her father’s address. In the months, and even years, to follow I wish I had made a greater effort to reach out through others to set up a visit.

Among many things I would have loved to ask her was something I should have asked her “Daddy” as she called him even in her old age: Did he ever put notes with Wooden-ism – Daddy-isms to her! – in her school lunches?

I would have shared with Nan how I had made a daily habit of writing notes such as “Have a great day!” or “Good luck on your spelling test!” or “I miss you lots!” on paper napkins and putting them inside Dallas’s Little Mermaid lunchbox and Greg’s Power Rangers lunchbox.

Then, after I took them to meet her Daddy one unforgettable afternoon when they were 10 and nearly 8, I started adding his pearls of wisdom such as “Be quick, but don’t hurry” (a great reminder before a spelling test) and “Happiness begins where selfishness ends” and “Little things make big things happen” and dozens more.

Coach’s Seven-Point Creed, one line at a time, became a frequent go-to napkin jotting: “Be true to yourself. Make each day your masterpiece. Help others. Drink deeply from good books. Make friendship a fine art. Build shelter against a rainy day. Pray for guidance and give thanks for your blessings every day.”

We would discuss Wooden-isms at the dinner table and also talked about Coach’s “Pyramid of Success” and his personal definition of success: “Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming.”

Today, Dallas is already teaching Wooden-isms to her nearly 3-year-old daughter Maya and Greg frequently texts Wooden’s gems to me! I think Nan would have enjoyed hearing all this.

About losing Nell, Coach wrote to me once: “I no longer have any fear of death as that is my only chance, if He will forgive me of my sins, to be with her again.”

Maybe last Tuesday was a masterpiece day after all, in Heaven, with Coach, Nell and Nan smiling at their reunion.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Personalized Signed copies of WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and  “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” are available at WoodyWoodburn.com

It’s In The Cards: ‘You Are Amazing!’

by Woody

In my wallet I carry a small card John Wooden gave me bearing his father’s “Seven-Point Creed”:

“1. Be true to yourself. 2 Help others. 3. Make each day your masterpiece. 4. Drink deeply from good books. 5. Make friendship a fine art. 6. Build shelter against a rainy day. 7. Pray for guidance, count and give thanks for your blessings each day.”

Of less famous heritage, but no less inspirational, I have another business card-sized memento. It is a “You Are Amazing! And So Am I” card and the brainchild of a friend I will call “Josh” to protect his privacy.

The cards Josh hands out are all the more amazing because he oftentimes feels he is the least amazing person on earth. Indeed, Josh, who lives in another state now, has wrestled with many demons, from mental illness to homelessness, which are often two sides of the same coin, and other hardships as well.

Josh also has an enlarged heart – not medically, but figuratively. He has literally given the coat off his back in cold weather to someone he felt had a greater needed for it. With his last twenty bucks, he has been known to buy groceries or a hamburger and fries for hungry strangers.

And he has given out thousands of his “Amazing!” cards in an effort to lift people up when they are feeling down.

In full, the front of the light-blue card reads in various fonts and bright colors: “You Are… Love Happiness Strength Understanding Beauty Respect Compassion Joy Teamwork Peace. Together We Are The Solution.”

The backside further encourages: “Create Kindness. Make Kindness. Become Kindness. You Are Amazing! And So Am I! Thank You For Being You!”

“I believe that the more someone believes they are amazing inside, the more they will project out their amazing-ness,” Josh told me. “So I began telling everyone around me they were amazing or awesome. Then I thought, what better way to remind someone, no matter what they are going through, than a card and – Bam! – the ‘Amazing!’ cards were born.”

A friend of his who worked at a printing company helped Josh design the card and, showing her own Kindness and Amazing-ness, printed up 2,000 cards at a discount price. He quickly needed a second run, and another, and to date has passed out more than 10,000 ‘Amazing!’ cards.

“I purposely have no name on the cards because it isn’t about the giver, it is about whoever is reading it,” Josh noted. “I believe that as they read these words they are flipping their negative perspective to the positive. I think it’s also awesome that there is no religion attached to the cards – just a belief in oneself, each other, and the kindness that links us together.”

In that vein, in addition to the cards Josh has organized some “You Are Amazing! And So Am I!” outings where community members do random acts of kindness such as cleaning the homes of elderly citizens.

“These acts are a way of reminding people there is hope in one another and in believing in ourselves,” Josh says.

Even during times he has lost belief in himself, Josh says he tries to focus on “spreading love and kindness to others.”

“I love seeing people’s reaction to the cards,” he continued. “People are so encouraged. They really do smile and you can see a change in their heart. People would thank me and even ask (before the coronavirus pandemic) for hugs.”

Coming full circle, when it comes to the “Seven-Point Creed” Josh certainly measures up Amazingly!

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Personalized Signed copies of WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and  “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” are available at WoodyWoodburn.com

 

National Book Month In One Day

by Woody

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

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National Book Month

List In One Day

Well, this isn’t the first time I’ve been late to a party. October is National Book Month and a friend invited me to join a 31-day challenge. Below, in one day, is my full month of answers.

Had I replied to the prompts yesterday, there’s a good chance half my answers might be different; tomorrow, perhaps the other half would change. I hope you are inspired you to come up with your own list.

Day 1 – The Best Book You’ve Read This Year: Tie between “The Nickel Boys” by Colson Whitehead and “This Tender Land” by William Kent Krueger.

Day 2 – A Book That You’ve Read More than Three Times: “The Old Man and the Sea” by Ernest Hemingway.

Day 3 – Your Favorite Series: “The Famous Bedtime Story Books” by Thornton Burgess.

Day 4 – Favorite Book of Your Favorite Series: “The Adventures of Buster Bear.”

Day 5 – A Book That Makes You Happy: Most any Dr. Seuss book.

Day 6 – A Book That Makes You Sad: “Old Yeller” by Fred Gipson.

Day 7 – Most Underrated Book: “Sweet Tuesdays” by John Steinbeck.

Day 8 – Most Overrated Book: I don’t think a book can be overrated, but Ann Patchett’s new offering, “The Dutch House”, didn’t lived up to the hype for me.

Day 9 – A Book You Thought You Wouldn’t Like But Ended Up Loving: “Lincoln in the Bardo” by George Saunders.

Day 10 – Favorite Classic Book: “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” by some fella named Mark Twain.

Day 11 – A Book You Hated: Knowing the effort every writer puts into a book, my lips are sealed.

Day 12 – A Book You Used to Love But Don’t Anymore: My crushes all remain intact.

Day 13 – Your Favorite Writer: John Steinbeck is a close second behind my daughter Dallas Woodburn.

Day 14 – Book From Your Favorite Writer: “The Grapes of Wrath” by Steinbeck and “Woman, Running Late, In A Dress” by Woodburn.

Day 15 – Favorite Male Character: Atticus Finch (I have not read “Go Set a Watchman.”)

Day 16 – Favorite Female Character: Charlotte A. Cavatica.

Day 17 – Favorite Quote: “Isn’t it pretty to think so?” Final line of “The Son Also Rises” by Hemingway.

Day 18 – First “Chapter Book” You Can Remember Reading As A Child: “Charlotte’s Web.”

Day 19 – Favorite Book Turned Into A Movie (I’ll add the stipulation “good” movie): The Harry Potter series.

Day 20 – Book That Makes You Laugh Out Loud: “A Walk In The Woods” by Bill Bryson.

Day 21 – Favorite Book From Your Childhood: “Where the Wild Things Are” by Maurice Sendak.

Day 22 – Book You’re Currently Reading: “Mr. Penumbra’s 24-Hour Bookstore” by Robin Sloan and halfway through, I’m loving it.

Day 23 – Your Guilty Pleasure: Anything by Robert Fulghum.

Day 24 – A Book You Wish More People Would Read: “Fog” by Ken McAlpine; “We Stood Upon Stars” by Roger W. Thompson; and “Wooden & Me” by me!

Day 25 – Favorite Book You Read In School: “To Kill a Mockingbird” by Harper Lee.

Day 26 – Favorite Autobiography: “They Call Me Coach” by John Wooden.

Day 27 – The Most Surprising Plot Twist or Ending: “Life of Pi” by Yann Martel.

Day 28 – Favorite Title: “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs” by Judi Barrett.

Day 29 – A Book Few Have Heard Of That You Loved: “The Snow Goose” by Paul Gallico.

Day 30 – Book on the top of your To Read Next Pile: “The Goldfinch” by Donna Tartt.

Day 31 – Favorite Book: Impossible! But if I must try, a tie between Hemingway’s “The Old Man and the Sea” and “Travels with Charley” by Steinbeck.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

By Day’s End, It Was Nearly Perfect

by Woody

Is your Club or Group looking for an inspiring guest speaker or do you want to host a book signing? . . . Contact Woody today!

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1StrawberriesCoverWooden-&-Me-cover-mock-upFor a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

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By Day’s End, It Was Nearly Perfect

The airplane was coming in damaged and ablaze.

The pilot needed to land on the aircraft carrier’s flight deck, a tiny postage stamp in the middle of the ocean, and additionally had to snag the tailhook on the arresting wire to keep from skidding off.

Moreover, the pilot would have only one try. If he came in at the wrong angle, the wrong incline, the wrong speed, there would be no time for a second approach.

There actually proved nearly not time enough for one attempt: mere seconds after the pilot landed perfectly and escaped the cockpit quickly, the plane became a fireball.

The heart-skipping adventure was related to me by my luncheon seatmate, himself a hero in a “Vietnam Veteran” hat and buddy of the pilot, before I was to get up and share stories about John Wooden. I think my seatmate rightly should have been given the microphone as the day’s guest speaker.

The top block of Coach Wooden’s famous Pyramid of Success is “Competitive Greatness” which he defined thusly: “Be at your best when your best is needed.” Hearing the harrowing fireball tale, I told my seatmate: “That is truly being at your best when your best is needed!”

As generally happens when I am asked to give a talk, I wind up on the receiving end. This time, not only did I leave with a new tale to share about true “Competitive Greatness” but I also departed with a new book – “Coach Wooden and Me” by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, an unexpected gift from my storytelling seatmate, Tom McEachern.1perfectDayWiiden

Making Tom’s thoughtfulness all the more special was that it mimicked a kindness Coach Wooden once did me. As I was leaving his home at the end of an afternoon visit, he excused himself to go to his study and returned with a book as a gift.

I thanked Coach, but embarrassingly told him he had already given me too many gifts in the past. I insisted he keep the book and that I would happily stop at the bookstore on my way home to buy my own copy.

Smiling wryly, Coach said: “Well, Woody, I can’t very well give it to anyone else because I’ve already signed it to you.”

We shared a laugh before Coach rejoined: “I still want you to stop at the bookstore to buy an extra copy and give it to a friend for no reason.”

In other words, in Wooden-ism words: “Make friendship a fine art.”

Tom had not known this story before buying me a gift book, but after hearing me share the anecdote during my talk he did a second Wooden-like thing: he had me sign an extra copy of my memoir “Wooden & Me” to give to one of his friends for no reason.

Later that same day, another Wooden-ism I shared with the audience returned to mind: “You cannot live a perfect day until you do something for someone else who will never be able to repay you.”

Inspired by Coach, and by Tom, and most specifically by a young man in Chicago – who I mentioned in this space a month ago after he gave the expensive winter boots off his own feet to a homeless man with tattered sneakers – I gave a nearly new pair of running shoes to a local homeless man because his shoes had deteriorated so greatly they afforded less protection than flip-flops.

Truth is, I received far more than I gave.

On this same day still, and returning full circle to books, a friend told me she was donating some new books to a Little Free Library on my behalf.

I am not sure it is possible to live a perfect day, but this one was definitely a very, very good one.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Wooden & Me Kickstarter Front PhotoCheck out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

Fast-Break Iambic Rhythms

by Woody

STRAW_CoverWoody’s highly anticipated new book “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” is NOW available! Order your signed copy HERE! 

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Iambic Rhythms at Fast-Break Pace

What do Alexander Hamilton and John Wooden have in common? An obvious answer is the number 10: Hamilton is on the 10-dollar bill and Wooden won a record 10 NCAA national championships as a basketball coach.

Meanwhile, about the last denominator the legendary secretary of the treasury and legendary Wizard of Westwood would seem to share is hip-hop music.1raphamilton

Well, the critically acclaimed Broadway musical “Hamilton” is performed in rap lyrics. Lin-Manuel Miranda, the creative genius who wrote the music, lyrics and playbook, is making rap more mainstream than March Madness office pools. Indeed, “Hamilton” is harder to get tickets to than the Final Four and here’s an iambic fast-break highlight why:

“How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a Scotsman, dropped in the middle of a forgotten / spot in the Caribbean by Providence impoverished in squalor grow up to be a hero and a scholar?

“The Ten dollar, founding father without a father / got a lot farther by working a lot harder / by being a lot smarter by being a self-starter / by fourteen, they placed him in charge of a trading charter.”

Take a breath, because that is only the first 10 seconds of the four-minute opening song. Act I has 24 songs in all and Act II has 23.

Which brings us to three other rap songs, the video links to which a friend emailed me, asking: “What do you think Coach Wooden would think?”

In his offering “Wooden Heart,” artist Fearce Vill mixes imagery Coach would admire along with some Wooden-isms:

“I go the hard route / I don’t play it safe / because the scuff on my shoe represents / what I’ve been through / so I’m gonna keep runnin’, runnin’

“The scuff on my shoe represents / what I’ve been through / so I’m gonna take one day at a time / one day at a time

“Things turn out best for the people / who make the best of the way things turn out / Everybody want a free throw / but nobody want to work for it”

The artist known as “Freestyle” offers these slam-dunk lines:

“John Wooden taught me / you get back what you put in it / The things he said are music to my ears

“He taught us that a poor man’s wealth is his ability / Winning takes talent / to repeat takes character / That’s what he taught the people across America

“Success is never final / failure is never fatal / What counts is the courage you bring to the table.”

And in “The Keys,” Megan Ran uses the rhythmic verbal beat of a quickly dribbled basketball while incorporating Wooden’s famous Pyramid of Success along with other maxims:

“Most times we won / before we even stepped upon the court / Tools for life much bigger than any sport / Life lessons for leaders, athletes and teachers / even musicians pushing education through the speakers on me

“Yeah, on me / these are the keys, ready / enthusiasm, intentness, loyalty, dedication, physical and mental fitness, self-control, confidence, poise, skill and condition / Better get on your mission / to make it come to fruition

“Little things make big things happen / Make each day your masterpiece / Never forget the team /Always keep the ‘we’ before the ‘me’ / Ask questions / because these here are the best lessons / Follow these keys and success is destined.”

Now back to my friend Bill’s question of what Wooden might think of these rap songs were he alive today. I think, like me, he would love them!

After all, Coach had a passion for poetry – reading, writing, reciting. Indeed, listening to these hip-hop tributes reminds me of how Coach would oftentimes recite a poem, fast-paced, almost rapper-like.

Too, I believe he would be pleased that his teachings are being shared with a new generation and audience.

Coach Wooden, however, might have had one reminder for Fearce Vill, Megan Ran, Freestyle, and the cast of “Hamilton” – “Be quick, but don’t hurry.”

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Wooden&Me_cover_PRCheck out my new memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece”

Champagne for the Heart

by Woody

 My new memoir WOODEN & ME is available here at Amazon

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Compliments Are Champagne for the Spirit

A short while ago, I wrote about a party for Laszlo Tabori in honor of history’s third four-minute mile he ran 60 years ago. The theme of that occasion, and my column, was exemplified by this old Irish proverb:

’Tis better to buy a small bouquet / And give to your friend this very day,

Than a bushel of roses white and red / To lay on his coffin after he’s dead.

1twaincomplimentWhile the anniversary party was a grand bouquet, I have personally witnessed how a single flower in the form of a few kind words can make a person feel as though champagne is flowing through his veins. Considering compliments cost nothing, it seems a shame we are oftentimes stingy dispensing them.

As my son puts it: “Giving compliments does a lot more good than taking out the trash, and should thus be done more than once a week.”

At the risk of appearing self-serving, I hope sharing a few compliments I have received recently will serve to inspire others to give their own friends, family, and even strangers, a verbal splash of champagne to lift some spirits before they next take out the trash.

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Let me begin with the generous people who complimented me by responding to a request in this space a few weeks ago to sponsor sign-up fees, and buy new gift tennis rackets, for the USTA youth lessons program that began this week at Buena High School.

Led by a generous donation from Carolyn Hertel – who noted with her contribution, “Tennis is not only a sport for life, the people you meet are often friends forever” – readers served up more than $1,200 to give disadvantaged kids a better summer.

As program director Paul Olmsted told me: “Wow! With all the trouble in the world it is uplifting to know that there really are some generous people out there.”

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Among of the nicest compliments I have received as a writer was when a man came up to me at a restaurant, pardoned himself for the interruption, and proceeded to show me one of my columns he keeps in his wallet. I have figuratively folded up the memory for my own safekeeping when I need a lift.

In a span of just a few days another reader came up to me at a “Wooden & Me” book signing and shared that she routinely displays my columns on her refrigerator; a teacher told me she occasionally reads and discusses my columns with her high school class; and a woman at a service group I was a guest speaker at showed me a thick folder of my columns she has clipped out, explaining through tears how my words have affected her life over the years.

As Paul Olmsted put it, “Wow!” Each encounter took only a brief moment from the giver, but I can assure you the good feelings in the receiver have been lasting.

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Sometimes a first-rate compliment can be passed forward secondhand.

Larry Baratte, head swimming coach at Ventura College and a Ventura County Sports Hall of Fame inductee, attended the Southern California Sports Broadcasters Awards Luncheon as a guest two weeks past.

The event featured a Father’s Day theme and one of the speakers was John Wooden’s daughter, Nan. Larry had the opportunity to meet Nan and happened to mention me to her. This in itself was a kind thing to do, but even kinder was his reaching out to me afterwards with Nan’s immediate response: “Daddy loved Woody.”

Hearing those three words left me sitting speechless for five minutes, lost in memories with tears in my eyes but also champagne in my heart. Larry’s forwarded compliment not only made my day a masterpiece, to borrow one of my favorite Wooden-isms, it made my entire month a masterpiece.

Remarkably, despite my two-decade friendship with Coach and many visits in his home, I have never met Nan. This is something I must soon remedy. I need to find the right words, a small bouquet of a compliment, to put some bubbles of joy in her veins.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Wooden-&-Me-cover-mock-upCheck out my new memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece”

Column: Wooden and Friendship

by Woody

Wooden Made Friendship a Fine Art

 

Monday – October 14 – would have been John Wooden’s 103rd birthday. Below, excerpted from my new memoir Wooden & Me: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” (signed copies available at WoodyWoodburn.com and unsigned paperbacks at Amazon.com), is an example of how he walked his talk.

 

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The next time I joined Coach John Wooden for a brisk morning walk, I did something I embarrassingly neglected to do in all my excitement the first time: I brought a gift of thanks for his hospitality.

 

Coach with two very happy young visitors in his home: my son Greg and daughter Dallas.

 

Coach thanked me for the book while insisting a gift was completely unnecessary. Shortly thereafter I received a handwritten thank-you note; included within was a postcard-sized printed poem authored by Wooden titled “On Friendship”:

 

At times when I am feeling low, / I hear from a friend and then

 

My worries start to go away / And I am on the mend

 

No matter what the doctors say – /And their studies never end

 

The best cure of all, when spirits fall, / Is a kind word from a friend

 

 

More prized than the signed poem is that over the ensuing years Coach would turn the words into deed when my spirits fell – particularly when my mom passed away in 1992 and when I was severely injured by a speeding drunk driver in 2003.

 

Even when my spirits were already high, Coach had a gift for raising them further. For example, when I next visited him he recited a poem from the Rumi volume I had given him. I must confess I did not know whom Coach was quoting until he told me. It was not surprising, however, that his selection was titled “Love” since Coach always insisted it was the most important word in the English language.

 

What a thoughtful and eloquent gesture, what rare grace. It was a simple reminder that saying “thank you” is nice, but to show thanks is far better. Write a note of thanks, certainly, but also wear a new sweater or necklace the next time you see the person who gave it to you; put a gift vase on proud display before the giver visits; memorize a poem or line from a book given to you. Time and again in ways big and small, Coach put into practice the fifth rule printed on his father’s seven-point creed: “Make friendship a fine art.”

 

One of Coach’s many exceptional qualities was how he made people feel special by giving each individual he was interacting with his undivided attention. For example, he was perhaps the slowest, and the most gracious, autograph-signer in history because he made a conscious effort to engage each fan in a brief conversation.

 

Similarly, Coach always gave his full attention on the phone and never seemed in a hurry to hang up. Indeed, if he was too busy to talk he would simply not answer the phone in the first place rather than risk the prospect of having to be in a rude rush.

 

I fondly remember visiting Coach when the phone rang and he let the call go through to his answering machine. The message conveyed was that I was his guest and thus merited his complete focus. This unspoken kindness became even greater seconds later after the “Beep!” when a very familiar voice could be heard leaving a message.

 

“That’s Bill Walton!” I said, excitedly. “You’d better answer it!”

 

Coach did not move towards the phone and instead replied with a devilish smile: “Heavens no! Bill calls me all the time. If I pick up he’ll talk my ear off for half an hour and then you and I won’t get to visit. I’ll talk with him later.”

 

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for the Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. WOODEN & ME is available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com and Amazon.com.