Tag Archives: kids

Balloons Filled with Wisdom, Love

by Woody

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

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Balloons Filled with

Wisdom and Love

Selfishness may not be on the rise, but it sometimes seems that is the case. It therefore seems timely to share an unattributed story my friend Larry Baratte sent me shortly before his death, which I have rewritten for brevity.

An elementary school teacher asked the children in all grades to each blow up a balloon and then write his or her name on it. The inflated balloons were tossed into the hallway and mixed around thoroughly.

The teacher then set a timer for five minutes and instructed the students to find the balloon with their own name on it. On the word “Go!” the children ran around helter-skelter looking for their own balloon.

When time ran out, not a single child had succeeded.

Now the teacher told them, wherever they were standing, to grab the balloon nearest them and personally give it to the person whose name was on it. In less than two minutes, everyone had their own balloon.

“Balloons are like happiness,” the teacher explained, “no one will find it very quickly by looking for theirs only.”

That wisdom bookends nicely with another email I received recently. It quoted a group of children, ages 4 to 8, who were asked: “What does love mean?” Their answers are as uplifting as helium balloons.

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” – Billy, age 4.

“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries.” – Chrissy, age 6.

“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis, too. That’s love.” – Rebecca, age 8.

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.” – Terri, age 4.

“Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.” – Karl, age 5.

“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt and then he wears it every day.” – Noelle, age 7.

“Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.” – Elaine, age 5.

“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and just listen.” – Bobby, age 7.

“If you want to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate.” – Nikka, age 6.

“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.” – Tommy, age 6.

“During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.” – Cindy, age 8.

“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.” – Mary Ann, age 4.

“My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.” – Clare, age 6.

“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” – Karen, age 7.

“Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him to make sure the taste is okay.” – Danny, age 8.

“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” – Jessica, age 8.

In other words, like happiness, love is like a balloon – you won’t find it by looking only for your own.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

Holiday Ball Drive Heroes

by Woody

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

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Holiday Generosity

Bounces And Rolls In

            Jim Parker, my former longtime colleague in the Star sports department, lived up to his nickname “Swami” by peering deeply into his crystal ball and donating a basketball two days before my column ran kicking off Woody’s Annual Holiday Sports Drive.

Another past colleague, Derry Eads – whose nickname “Deuce” is itself a nickname for “Swami II” given to him because he followed Parker as our high school football prognosticator – shortly thereafter also donated a basketball.

In the spirit of the Star’s Bellringer campaign, I’d like to publicly thank some more kind givers who have helped get the ball rolling to give smiles to some local disadvantaged youth.

Rebecca Fox, like numerous others this year, made her donation in honor of the late Jim Cowan, a longtime Ventura County Superintendent of Schools, who annually gave ten basketballs to the cause. Wrote Fox: “Jim Cowan was my first boss when I started working for the Ventura County Office of Education in 1979. He was a great boss – kind, supportive and well-respected. In honor of him I have donated a soccer ball. So glad you started this great tradition of giving back to our youth.”

Dan and Judy Dugan dished out a big assist of five basketballs.

Leslie Seifert-De Los Santos also gave five basketballs in honor of her late father, Arthur Seifert, sharing: “He was literally a lifelong basketball player. Even in his late seventies, he could be found on basketball courts throughout the county, playing pick-up games with people much younger than himself, laughing and encouraging others. He loved watching the Lakers play throughout the years and, even when wheelchair bound, he would be cheering and ‘coaching’ from his seat.”

Alan and Kathy Hammerand donated two each basketballs, soccer balls and footballs; Jean Warnke added one football and basketball; and Bobbie and Dave Williams kicked in one soccer ball and football.

Allison Johnson dished out one basketball “in honor of my brother, Michael Demeter, who played four years of college ball at Cal Lutheran University.”

John Manion donated one basketball and one football, and recalled watching Jim Cowan play on two state championship teams at Ventura College: “When I was 11-12, I would go to all the Ventura JC basketball games. I went both years they had those great teams. The first year they were great, but the second year with the addition of Ernie Hall, they were so much fun to watch.”

Linda Calderon donated five basketballs while Irma Paramo and her husband donated four more basketballs.

Don Rodrigues donated six basketballs in Cowan’s memory: “He was a great guy, friend and highly respected in our community.”

Susan Adamich donated half a dozen basketballs, sharing: “Jim Cowan was a very dear man and always welcomed me into their home – his daughter Janice and I have been friends for over 40 years! I am happy to honor him by giving something special to kids.”

Ann Cowan, Jim’s widow, carried on her husband’s tradition of donating 10 basketballs, sharing: “It was such a big part of ‘getting ready for the holidays’ for Jim and the family is very proud of that legacy.”

There is still time to drop off a new sports ball at a local Boys & Girls Club, YMCA, church, youth group – or to Jensen Design & Survey (9 a.m. to 5 p.m. through Dec. 20) at 1672 Donlon St. in Ventura and I’ll take it from there. Online orders can be shipped to the same address.

Also, dear readers, please email me about your gift at woodywriter@gmail.com so I can add your generosity to this year’s growing tally.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

Two New Kites, One Old Memory

by Woody

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Flying Kites Make

The Mind Soar

On a recent afternoon with spring in the breeze, something else wonderful was in the air: a kite.

Shortly, a second kite rose.

Like bookends separated by a long row of volumes, these two park scenes played out with an hour sandwiched between. Each vignette made me smile. Together, they made my heart soar as if aided by the wind and a knotted rag tail.

Before proceeding, a third kite bears mention – this one flown a quarter-century ago by my daughter, then four. It was her first kite and she had impatiently waited many days for the wind to be strong enough for a maiden flight.

If memory serves, and I am certain it does for this remains a cherished image, My Little Girl skipped to the park while happily singing the “Mary Poppins” lyrics, “Let’s go fly a kite and send it soaring. Up through the atmosphere. Up where the air is clear…”

After getting her 99-cent rainbow kite airborne, I handed the string to My Little Girl and her reaction, along with a beaming smile, was this: “Daddy, it feels like catching a big fish in the sky.”

This was a wonderful observation considering My Little Girl had never felt the tug of a fish.

Which brings me to the first kite I sighted this spring. Another little girl, perhaps six instead of four, was flying a kite decorated with a unicorn instead of a rainbow. Watching from afar, I readily imagined she also was likely thinking of fishing in the sky …

… because instead of holding a spool of cotton string, this little girl controlled her kite with a fishing rod and nylon line in a reel. What an ingenious father she had, I thought.

Too, I thought back to climbing a tree to retrieve My Little Girl’s rainbow kite after the string snapped and it fluttered into the clutches of branches. We promptly went to a kite store and got nylon “rope” as she called the heavier string.

Time passes, but not all things change. The little girl with the unicorn kite tethered by fishing line seemed as excited as if Christmas morning had arrived on a June afternoon. When the breeze held its breath too long, she handed the rod and reel to her father and skipped off to retrieve her grounded kite; held it high overhead; and then giggled when her father got it back up where the air is clear.

I could have watched this all afternoon, but too soon the happy pair departed hand-in-hand.

Not five minutes later, a second kite flyer arrived and the contrast could hardly have been more striking. Now I watched a gentleman, in his sixties I guessed, and alone; sailing a stunt kite without a fishing reel but with multiple strings that allowed him to make it zig-zag and spin and even dive to within inches of the ground before soaring again.

Again, the fishing metaphor was impossible to ignore for the gentleman was wearing a flannel shirt, stained pants and a brim hat that begged to be decorated with tied flies. Sitting in a folding beach chair, he seemed to belong lakeside or on a pier.

As the gentleman flew his kite, seated patiently as if waiting for a big fish to strike his line, my mind returned to the little girl I had just seen; then to My Little Girl; and finally I had one more lovely thought.

I imagined the gentleman’s mind was also wandering, drifting backward on the warm breeze to memories of flying a kite with his own little girl.

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FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at woodywoodburn. His books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

Time Machine on Two Wheels

by Woody

STRAW_CoverWoody’s highly anticipated new book “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” is NOW available! Order your signed copy HERE! 

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Summer Time Machine on Two Wheels

Summertime is a time machine. Just as hearing an old song can transport one’s thoughts back to his or her youth, so can summertime sights (barbecues, bikinis, bursting fireworks) and smells (sunscreen, chlorine, freshly mowed grass) make the calendar pages leap backwards.

Although summer has no monopoly on it, I recently saw a time-machine sight that is far more common during summertime than the other three seasons combined: a kid learning to ride a bicycle.1bikeridekid

This milestone typically plays out on a neighborhood sidewalk, quiet cul de sac, or empty parking lot. A father, or mother, holds the bike seat from behind to provide balance – and, at first, a little propulsion – while quick-stepping alongside as the child pedals.

To describe what universally happens next, I will share a specific scene I recently watched unfold. A young girl, maybe 6 and wearing a pink bike helmet that bobbled because it was too big, was on a bike that somehow seemed too small.

The dad kept the bike upright by holding the seat with one hand while the mom watched and cheered and took video. With each attempt, the tiny bike seemed to wobble a little less; the little feet pedaled more surely; and the girl’s frown of fright turned into a growing smile of happiness and confidence.

Also with each attempt, the dad’s stride quickened slightly; his grip on the bike seat grew less vise-like; and his smile, too, widened.

There were falls, of course, but no scraped knees because the father was wiser than I had been when I was in his shoes. He was teaching his daughter on a soccer field. What a brilliant way to minimize the fear of falling than to have soft grass to tumble on.

Grass, however, is more difficult to pedal on than pavement. This hindrance was overcome by doing the rides on a very slightly downhill section – the equivalent of the Wright Brothers always heading into the wind for extra lift at Kitty Hawk.

On one of the young girl’s attempts, as magically as when Orville was airborne for the very first time, she was suddenly defying gravity on two-wheels. At first, of course, she did not know that her dad’s hand was no longer helping her stay upright. And so the dad and mom felt the magic of the moment first.

Indeed, only when the daughter noticed her dad was no longer beside her did she realize she was flying solo. Shortly thereafter, the downhill turned flat and she ran out of steam and toppled over. By then she had traveled maybe 120 feet, as Orville did on his maiden flight, but each ride thereafter went further and longer until perhaps reaching the 852 feet that Wilbur achieved on that 1903 historical day.

The time machine sight of this girl’s personal Kitty Hawk sent me back to my own 1965 historical day. My two older Woodburn Brothers combined forces to teach me. I’m not sure their motivation was kindness so much as that if I learned to ride I would then need Doug’s hand-me-down bike; Doug would inherit Jim’s; and Jim would get a new one.

They took turns running alongside holding the seat to help me balance until – like the little girl above, and like you, and like your own children – after a while everything clicked and I was soaring solo. It is remarkable how something impossible can become second nature in an instant.

My brothers cheered me on as I rode off down the street and proceeded around the block. When I came back around they were both gone – Mom had called us inside for dinner and they had not waited for me.

Unfortunately, they had neglected to teach me how to use the coaster brakes. So around the block I went a second time, and a third, and still no one came out to help me stop without falling.

Falling, of course, is how I finally stopped. I came inside with a red badge of courage on my knee from the sidewalk. Goodness, that was a masterpiece summer day.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Wooden&Me_cover_PRCheck out my new memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece”

Column: Trophies Don’t Tarnish Kids

by Woody

Trophy Generation is older than you think

 

“Our youth now love luxury. They have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for their elders and love chatter in place of exercise; they no longer rise when elders enter the room; they contradict their parents, chatter before company; gobble up their food and tyrannize their teachers.”

 

            Some complaints never change, although if Socrates made his above cavil today he would surely add, “And why do kids always get awarded trophies?” Trophy

 

            Interestingly, this latter grievance about the Millennial Generation and Generation Z is often made by men remarried to young “trophy” wives or women wearing jewels they didn’t get for winning a 5K race or tennis tournament. Indeed, Boomers and Gen X might be the real Trophy Generations. But I am getting ahead of myself.

 

            It has become a regular occurrence writers and TV talking heads to publicly take today’s youth to task for being raised on praise, feeling entitled, being lazy, loving luxury (and video games), having bad manners and gobbling up their junk food.

 

These generalities are, to quote Wonderland’s Alice, “stuff and nonsense.” Sure, plenty of kids are spoiled punks – and thus it has always been as Socrates suggests – but so are a lot of adults.

 

            Most recently, Ashley Merryman, co-author of “NurtureShock: New Thinking About Children” went all Socrates on kids in an Op-Ed essay in the New York Times headlined: “Losing Is Good For You.”

 

            Merryman un-merrily opened her missive: “As children return to school this fall and sign up for a new year’s worth of extracurricular activities, parents should keep one question in mind. Whether your kid loves Little League or gymnastics, ask the program organizers this: ‘Which kids get awards?’ If the answer is, ‘Everybody gets a trophy,’ find another program.”

 

            You would think trophies are as dangerous as extra chunky Jif is to a school kid with a peanut allergy.

 

            Merryman continued: “Today, participation trophies and prizes are almost a given, as children are constantly assured that they are winners.”

 

            And: “If I were a baseball coach, I would announce at the first meeting that there would be only three awards: Best Overall, Most Improved and Best Sportsmanship. Then I’d hand the kids a list of things they’d have to do to earn one of those trophies. They would know from the get-go that excellence, improvement, character and persistence were valued.”

 

            Here’s the thing: kids aren’t stupid despite what some clueless adults think. Kids know that excellence, improvement, character and persistence are valued. They also know that receiving a participation trophy at an AYSO season-ending banquet doesn’t mean they were their team’s superstar.

 

The same may not be said for many adults who equate driving a flashy, expensive car with being an MVP. And isn’t the workplace replete with participation trophies like reserved parking spaces and Christmas bonuses awarded for time on the job rather than job excellence?

 

If prizes should be given only to “Best Overall” or for true “excellence,” then aren’t today’s adults showered with undeserved trophies considering everyone who finishes a marathon – even if they walk the entire way – receives a medal the size of a hubcap? How is this different than a Little League “participation trophy” or a “participation certificate” in a school spelling bee?

 

Another curmudgeonly “Hey-kids-get-off-my-lawn!”-like complaint Merryman and her ilk make is that today’s youth feel entitled to good grades. I’m guessing that Merryman – like most every employee between the ages of 30 and retirement in all professions – feels they have been greatly wronged upon receiving anything less than a sterling annual work review.

 

Merryman concludes: “. . . we need to refuse all the meaningless plastic and tin destined for landfills. We have to stop letting the Trophy-Industrial Complex run our children’s lives. This school year, let’s fight for a kid’s right to lose.”

 

A plastic trophy isn’t meaningless – nor all meaning. It’s merely a nice memento, like a team photo or 10K finisher’s medal.

 

This school year, let’s fight for a kid’s right to have adults lose the Socrates-like contemptuous chip on their shoulders.

 

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for the Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. His new memoir WOODEN & ME is now available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com and Amazon.com.

 

Column: Celebrating Summer

by Woody

Turn! Turn! Turn! The Season is Summer

 

            Remember when you were six or 12 and summer was a three-month recess and the only interruption to your fun was being called inside for dinner?

 

Then adulthood arrives and carefree summers depart.

 

            One of my earliest summers of freedom was 1965. This was also the year The Byrds’ version of “Turn! Turn! Turn! (to Everything There Is a Season)” hit No. 1 on the Billboard charts.

 

            I have this song stuck in my head because everywhere I turn, turn, turn, I see reminders that the season now is summer. I also hear, taste, smell and feel summertime’s touch.KidsPlaying

 

            Here are a few recent encounters, broken down into the five senses.

 

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Sight.

 

            Four girls and a boy, all between the ages of about four and six, playing on the grass at a local park. Specifically, they are racing around a small mud bog created by a faulty sprinkler.

 

            The giggling grows louder. The kids grow wilder. One of the girls cuts a corner too closely and a sneaker gets sucked off in the mud.

 

            The laughter, of course, instantly doubles in decibels. Soon another shoe is snatched. Instead of an obstacle, the mud bog has become the main attraction.

 

            Did I mention the children are wearing nice clothes, not swimming suits?

 

            I should also mention they are being watched by the mother of one of them. More accurately, she is a contender for Mom of the Year. I say this because of her reply when I passed by and commented on – and laughed at – the messy delight.

 

“It’ll all wash off,” she said, smiling happily.

 

            What a beautiful attitude. And what a beautiful summer it promises to be for those five kids.

 

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            Sound.

 

            Watching a collection of elementary school-age kids play different games at a summer day camp is fun, but listening to them is the real joy.

 

            For example, judging from the laughter and squeals of delight, even playing in mud can’t compare to throwing spongy playground balls at one another. Part of this is surely the novelty because many schools have banned dodge ball. Safety issues? In half an hour of battle no tears are shed, no Band-Aids required.

 

            Meanwhile, if you have never heard a game of outdoor musical chairs that begins with 30 kids and 29 chairs and one boom box, you are missing out.

 

            This, however, paled on the noise meter measuring the fun of a supervised water balloon battle!

 

            In other words, this 2013 day camp is a success because it duplicates the everyday summer life of kids growing up in the 1960s.

 

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            Taste.

 

            A lot of things just seem to taste better in the summer. Hamburgers, hotdogs or basically anything fresh off the barbecue, for example. Watermelon, certainly. All county fair foods. Iced tea and lemonade, margaritas and beer.

 

            But it says here nothing improves more in tastiness during the summer (and this is saying something because it’s delicious year-round) than ice cream. Amazingly, ice cream may taste its very best not on a blistering summer day but rather on a dreamy warm midsummer night.

 

            Rocky Road, to my taste buds, is best of all.

 

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            Smell.

 

            Just as hearing an old song can be a time machine of sorts, so too can scents.

 

Few things transport me back to my Wonder Years of summers as quickly and powerfully as the smell of sunscreen filling the air at the pool or beach.

 

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            Touch.

 

            Speaking of the beach and swimming pools, one of summer’s special senses of touch can also be seen and heard: the “ouch-ouch-ouch” and “hot-hot-hot” mutterings of someone as you watch them quick-stepping barefoot across broiling sand or cement.

 

            Meanwhile, instead of the soles, summer romances touch souls and hearts with held hands and kissed lips.

 

Turn, turn, turn. To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.

 

And summer, taking the best from the verses in the Book of Ecclesiastes, is a time to laugh and dance and embrace and love and cast time away.

 

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for the Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. His new memoir WOODEN & ME is available for pre-order at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.