Wheels of Fortunate Kindness

Three short stories, all taking place recently and involving wheels, but linked even more so by kindness.

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My writing desk in an upstairs loft overlooks an orchard and a well-traveled road. Every now and then I look up from my laptop and enjoy the view, and so it was the other morning I saw an SUV pull over and stop on the dirt shoulder abruptly enough to raise a small dust storm.

With the hazard taillights blinking, a woman driver got out and walked to the passenger side where she stood with phone in hand to her ear.

A short moment later, far too quickly for the person she had called to already arrive, a car so clean it could have just come from a car wash – and certainly would now need a rinse – stopped on the side of the road directly behind the SUV.

A male driver, seemingly middle-aged like the woman, got out and talked with her. From afar, they did not seem to know each other, much less be a husband coming to his wife’s aid.

He was, I believe, simply a Good Samaritan who had stopped, and stayed until a tow truck arrived, then left without a quick kiss or hug goodbye one would expect from a couple.

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A second tale, also involving four wheels, this time on a grocery cart.

Instead of a clichéd lone wobbly wheel, it was a lonely gentleman pushing the cart who seemed a little unsteady. This was certainly to be expected because, judging from his “World War II Air Force” ball cap, he was well into his 90s.

As I walked toward the store’s entrance, I watched across the way as the veteran returned his cart, quite far, to the return rack, a slow walk that seemed to take great effort.

It is said that there are two kinds of people in the world: those who return their carts and those who don’t. When I exited the grocery, I learned there is a third category: a rare person who returns multiple stray carts, for the WWII vet was now bringing back a cart back from a different area of the parking lot.

While I had only bought a single bag’s worth of groceries, and thus had no cart to return, I was now inspired to retrieve what appeared to be (for now) the last orphaned cart.

When I crossed paths with the nonagenarian, he offered me a handshake and said, “You’re a good man.” Surveying the parking lot, he added: “It looks much better. I think I’ll go home now.”

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A third scene, this time featuring a two-wheeler.

The bicycle was of the e-bike variety that are, too often, ridden too fast and too carelessly. Kid e-cyclists, especially, seem to make drivers hit their brakes and pedestrians jump from harm’s way.

And yet the other day I saw a gang of teen e-bikers riding around at a local park, safely and sanely, laughing contagiously and bothering no one.

The best part, however, was when one of the kids peeled away from his friends and raced across a soccer field; jumped off his e-bike almost before it had come to a compete skidding stop; looked both ways for traffic; then ran into the street to retrieve an errant soccer ball before a car flattened it.

The teen boy hopped back on his e-bike, fully inflated rescued soccer ball under one arm, and delivered it to a youth player on the field.

I am certain the WWII vet would have given him a handshake.

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody’s new novel “The Butterfly Tree” is now available in paperback and eBook at Amazon (click here), other online bookstores, and is orderable at all bookshops.

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Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn.

Imagining a COVID Victory Day

It remains one of the most iconic American photographs of the 20th century, of World War II specifically, a single image telling a thousand joyous words.

The black-and-white picture, taken by Alfred Eisenstaedt and published in Life magazine, was snapped in New York City’s Times Square on August 14, 1945 – “V-J Day” – after the news came of Japan’s surrender that effectively ended the war.

Close your eyes and, especially if you are old enough to be on the current COVID-19 vaccination age eligibility list, I bet you can see it in your mind’s eye right now:

In the middle of the crowded street that looks like a New Year’s Eve celebration albeit in daylight, a sailor in a dark uniform and white cap kisses a woman wearing a white dress, white stockings and mid-heeled white pumps. It is not just a peck kiss, but a swooning smooch that seemed choreographed by Hollywood.

The sailor leans the nurse slightly backward, pulling her close with his right hand on her arched back while his left arm cradles her shoulders and neck, and plants the kiss. As if in a romantic movie, she lifts one foot with bended knee behind her. In the background another sailor and a group of older women look on with amused smiles.

This famous photograph has been on my mind ever since the vaccinations for COVID-19 started ramping up. While coronavirus has certainly not surrendered, or been defeated, the end of this pandemic war is at least finally imaginable.

Yes, “V-S Day” (Victory over Stay-and-shelter Day) and “V-Q Day” (Victory over self-Quarantining Day) and “V-PJ Day” (Victory over wearing Pajamas every day Day) are imaginable.

In fact, it seems to me that each day now becomes a Victory Day worth celebrating for those who get their two vaccines – or one shot with the Johnson & Johnson.

Instead of kissing a stranger on the street, different iconic moments are happening as day by day more and more of us are celebrating our own Vaccine Day victory…

Grandparents are hugging their grandchildren for the first time in many months, if not for the first time in a full year.

These same grandparents are as well often hugging their own children for the first time in ages.

Senior citizens are happily embracing friends and fellow residents in assisted living facilities.

Uncles are hugging nephews and nieces, and nephews and nieces are hugging aunts, and aunts and uncles are hugging each other as well.

Some school children are even safely hugging their vaccinated teachers and, I imagine, teachers and principals and custodians and coaches are all embracing each other as well.

On and on, day by day, a parade of people are having 1945 Time Square moments in 2021.

Coincidentally, or thanks to what one of my dear friends calls “a god wink,” a random playlist on my computer recently played a Billie Holiday song from 1944 wartime titled, “I’ll Be Seeing You.” The lyrics, like the kissing photo, make me think of the happy days COVID-19 vaccines are making possible.

The song goes, “I’ll be seeing you … in all the old familiar places that this heart of mine embraces … in that small café … the children’s carousel” and so on. Of course, seeing in one’s imagination, as Holiday sings about, can’t compare to seeing each other in person without social distancing.

So if you have been vaccinated, or when you finally are, I urge you to have a little fun and recreate your own Times Square-like celebratory kiss – or, if more appropriate, a hug.

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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Personalized Signed copies of WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and  “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” are available at WoodyWoodburn.com

For Sale: Talking Dog

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

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Treated to Unexpected

Tall Tale in Bookstore

Once upon a time, only a few weeks past actually, I was treated to a story in a bookstore, which is a very good place for stories.

In particular, it was Mrs. Figs’ Bookworm in Camarillo, which is just about the best place in the world for stories because its owner, Connie Halpern, makes storytimes come to life when she reads aloud to children ages 1 to 102.

This story, however, did not come from Connie’s lips. Rather, it was told by 96-year-old Starr Thompson. In addition to being a Bookworm regular, Thompson is a former Flying Tiger as evidenced by the blue-and-orange ball cap he was wearing.

After serving in the Air Force in both WWII and Korea, Thompson joined the First American Volunteer Group (AVG) of the Chinese Air Force. These “Flying Tigers” were composed of U.S. military pilots recruited by President Franklin Roosevelt’s orders in 1941 before Pearl Harbor.

I did not write down the facts as I listened, only later, so if I get anything wrong the errors are mine. If I retell matters accurately, all credit goes to Mr. Thompson. And so, as memory serves…

A young man was driving through rural Ohio – which, coincidentally, is where Connie Halpern grew up, further proving truth is stranger than fiction – and a yard sign in front of a farmhouse caught his eye: For Sale / Talking Dog / $50.

The man put on the brakes, made a U-turn and pulled into the driveway.

“Hello,” greeted the farmer from a rocking chair on the porch. “You lost? I seen ya turnaround. Need directions?”

“No, no, I’m not lost,” the visitor answered. “I saw your sign about the talking dog and was curious – what’s the gimmick?”

“Ain’t no gimmick,” said the farmer.

The visitor rolled his eyes and turned to leave, but before he had taken his first footstep of retreat the farmer rejoined: “He’s ’round back. Go see for yourself.”

Curiosity getting the better of him, the visitor headed to the backyard where he found a Labrador, chocolate in color, sleeping in the shade of a buckeye tree. The dog raised its head as the visitor approached.

“Can I help you?”

The visitor twisted his neck to look at the farmer who had followed behind him, but there was no one there.

“I said, can I help you?” the Labrador repeated.

The visitor nearly fainted in his tracks. Upon regaining his senses, like a dazed boxer during a referee’s ten count, the visitor stammered: “You … really … can talk?”

“Of course I can talk,” the Labrador replied. “Have a seat and I’ll tell you even more.”

The gobsmacked visitor plopped down on the grass.

“I used to work at the airport sniffing for drugs and listening to conversations,” the Labrador continued. “If I heard something suspicious, I’d go tell my superior. Travelers can be an annoying bunch, though, so after a while I quit.

“Before long, I found I missed the excitement so I got a job with the FBI sniffing for explosives. I loved the thrill of it, but it’s a young dog’s game so last year the FBI forced me to retire – put me out to pasture here.”

The visitor, hardly able to believe his ears, returned to the front porch and said in astonishment: “My god, your dog is amazing! He’s worth a million dollars, at least, so why are you selling him so cheaply?”

“It’s all BS,” the farmer said, curtly. “Buster didn’t do any of that airport security and FBI stuff like he claims. He’s a good-for-nothing liar.”

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FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @woodywoodburn

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at woodywoodburn. His books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …