WOODEN & ME chapter excerpt: Bryans Brothers “Help Others”

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Chapter Nineteen

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Bryan Brothers Strive To “Help Others”

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Coach John Wooden put into daily practice his belief that “you can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.

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          Two small examples: he graciously signed autographs even when the request interrupted his meal, and he paid for the stamps himself to mail back items sent to him to be autographed that did not include return postage.BryanBros

 

Coach’s deeds and words have greatly inspired both my children ever since they were quite young. A dozen years ago Dallas, now 26, created “Write On! For Literacy” (writeonbooks.org), a nonprofit foundation to encourage kids to read and write. She has also held an annual Write On! Holiday Book Drive that has collected and donated more than twelve-thousand new books to disadvantaged youth.

 

At age sixteen Greg, now 23, similarly created his own nonprofit organization “Give Running” (giverunning.org) and since 2006 he has collected more than 14,000 pairs of running and athletic shoes, thousands of which he has personally washed by hand. These shoes have been sent to youth living in impoverished villages in numerous developing countries as well as to inner-city communities across the United States.

 

In addition to being deeply inspired to help others by Coach Wooden, Dallas and Greg have been blessed to have Mike and Bob Bryan – the winningest doubles tandem in tennis history – as key role models in their lives. Coach Wooden was a fan of Mike and Bob, for their sportsmanship as well as their athletic skills, he told me when I asked him to sign a Pyramid of Success as a gift for them.

 

Because the identical twins remember the childhood thrills they felt when getting autographs from their tennis heroes, Mike and Bob try to return the favor to today’s young fans. It is not unusual for them to spend half an hour or more after a match or a practice session signing autographs courtside.

 

“We feel it’s important to make time for fans,” says Mike.

 

Adds Bob: “It only takes a moment to make a kid smile, so why not take the time and make the effort to maybe make a small difference?”

 

How Wooden-like does that sound?

 

Mike and Bob’s time and effort often make more than a small difference. Through their nonprofit organization The Bryan Bros. Foundation they have supplied rackets to inner-city high school tennis teams; supported youth tennis leagues; sponsored young players with equipment and travel expenses; and in countless other ways succeeded in their mission to “help at-risk survive and thrive.” Too, Mike and Bob have generously supported Write On! and Give Running.

 

But perhaps never have Mike and Bob stood taller than when they made time for Shigeki Sumitani, a ten-year-old from Japan. When he emailed the Bryan Brothers asking for an autograph, they happily obliged.

 

A few weeks later, upon first learning that Shigeki was battling cancer, Mike and Bob solemnly signed a tennis ball and cap and also mailed the small boy one of the shirts they wore while winning their first Grand Slam championship at the French Open.

 

When they next learned that Shigeki’s father had bought autographed, match-used rackets of his son’s two other favorite players – Andy Roddick and Andre Agassi – on eBay, only to receive two unsigned knockoff rackets, Mike and Bob autographed one of the rackets they had just used in the French Open final and sent it by FedEx to him.

 

A small thing? Perhaps. But not to Shigeki. To him it made far more than a small difference. To him it meant the world. As Coach Wooden observed: “Sometimes the smallest gestures make the biggest difference.”

 

Shigeki passed away only a few days after that priority package arrived. He was wearing the championship shirt from the French Open, with the racket from that same match at his side, while listening to the “Five-Setter” music CD the Bryan Brothers Band had recently produced.

 

These kind gestures provided a little happiness when happiness had long before been chased away. Shigeki’s mother died at age thirty of a heart attack when her son was six years old, soon followed by his cancer diagnosis that very year. The cancer grew worse and worse. So did the pain.

 

“At the end, he knew his time was short,” said the elder Sumitani. “His treatments were very hard on him. Frequently he had attacks of severe pain. Sometimes he couldn’t sleep. Sometimes he made complaints. But he did his best.”

 

So did the Bryans. They sent Shigeki autographs and shoes and CDs and emails. Most importantly, they sent him the knowledge that they cared. Indeed, Bob and Mike embodied the Wooden-like words that their mother Kathy, a former professional tennis star herself, has preached to them since childhood: “It’s far more important who you are as person than who you are as an athlete.”

 

An only child, Shigeki used to tell his father he dearly wished he had a brother. Briefly, he got the next best thing: two long-distance surrogate big brothers. “Having the Bryans as his ‘older brothers’ made him happy,” the boy’s father confided to me.

 

Under much happier conditions, Mike and Bob have similarly been surrogate big brothers to Dallas and Greg, showing them endless support over the years. Many times when Greg needed it most – when stress fractures derailed his running on three different occasions or when he was a Rhodes Scholar Finalist but learned the ultimate opportunity to study abroad had eluded him – Mike and Bob have sent emails of encouragement. They have done the same during Dallas’s own tough times.

 

Conversely, in recognition of Dallas’ high points – her successful ascent of Mount Whitney; acceptance into college and graduate school; receiving the 2013-14 John Steinbeck Fellowship – Mike and Bob sent congratulatory flowers and text messages. Greg, too, has experienced the thrill of their kind gestures.

 

Dallas and Greg have emulated their big-brother role models by making small gestures to Mike and Bob in return. When the twins are home during a rare break from the pro tour, Dallas likes to bake “Friendship Bread” for them. And Greg has helped do their laundry. Wayne Bryan still happily recalls the time when this was not such a small thing after his twin sons had returned from a three-month clay-court season in Europe: “Greg and I did a world-record thirteen loads of wash, drying, and folding at the local Camarillo Coin Op Laundry. It took us some two and a half hours. We really chopped some wood. He had a smile on his face the whole time and we shared some laughs and he did a beautiful job and it was a day I’ll never forget.”

 

Greg feels the same way. There truly is great joy – and great memories created – in helping others.

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Wooden-&-Me-cover-mock-upExcerpted from WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece”

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