Trick-or-Treat Costs Arm and Leg
In case it has been sneaking up on you, there are only six shopping days remaining . . .
. . . until Halloween.
Somewhere over the past few decades trick-or-treat has become the warm-up act for Christmas. To give you an idea, the National Retail Federation estimates Americans will spend $350 million on Halloween costumes this year.
Murray as a DISH TV satellite dish (sort of).
Clarification: that’s $350 million on costumes for their pets!
For humans, the projected figure is $7.4 billion for costumes, candy and decorations. Candy alone will run $2 billion – and that doesn’t include dental bills six months down the road.
As far as pets go, I will spend the same amount on my dog Murray – an adorable boxer named in honor of the Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Jim Murray – that my parents used to spend on my siblings’ costumes and mine: zilch.
Back in the 1960s, kids made costumes out of boxes and paint, old clothes and sheets, this and that, all mixed with imagination. I’m not even sure you could buy a manufactured costume back then; I don’t think I ever saw a friend or classmate wearing one.
Today the most popular costumes come off store shelves – and off the silver screen. For girls, Elsa from “Frozen” reigns No. 1 according to the NRF while “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” Donatello, Rafael, Michelangelo and Leonardo collectively top the list for boys.
For adults, one of this year’s hot costumes is expected to be Ebola – not people dressed like the wormy virus but instead wearing containment suits.
Instead of sterile costumes from a box, here are some outside-the-box Halloween outfits I’d like to see come knocking on my door next Friday evening:
All the election signs throughout Ventura County dressed up as recycled trash.
Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard dressed as Administrator of the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency.
SoCal weather dressed up as rainy Seattle; our brown lawns costumed as a PGA putting green; our citizens dressed up as the Morton Salt Girl.
The iPhone6 Plus dressed up as a rotary rPhone1960.
Dodgers ace Clayton Kershaw in a postseason game dressed like Sandy Koufax.
Kobe Bryant dressed up in a Lakers playoff jersey without crutches.
The Los Angles Kings dressed up in their old purple-and-gold sweaters with a crown on the chest for the entire season.
The Scratch food truck as the Partridge Family bus.
Camarillo’s Mike and Bob Bryan, tennis’ all-time winningest “Dynamic Duo,” dressed as Batman and Robin even though they will probably have one of their trademark brotherly battles over who gets to be Batman.
Firemen, nurses, cops and teachers dressed up as Justice League heroes like Superman, Wonder Woman, Flash and Green Lantern.
An NFL team dressed up as Los Angeles’ home squad.
Roger Goodell dressed up as the former Commission of the NFL.
My Venturan friend Ken McAlpine, who has written a new thriller novel “Juncture,” dressed up as a New York Times bestselling author.
Jeff McElroy, another friend and author of the surf noir short-story collection “Californios,” same as above.
My dad as the grandpa in the comic “Pickles” and my son as Jeremy in “Zits.”
Congress dressed up with “Will Work For Food” signs.
Oscar-winning Actress Renee Zellweger dressed in a mask of how she used to look.
Malala Yousafzai, the Pakistani teenager who was shot in the head by the Taliban before becoming the youngest Nobel Peace Prize winner in history, dressed as the President of the United Nations General Assembly.
Venturan Erin Prewitt, a role model an advocate for forgiveness after her husband Chris was hit and killed by a drunk driver, dressed as Malala Yousafzai.
The Kickstarter campaign at local DATA Middle School to fund painting of a “Make it a Great Day” 50-foot mural on campus that celebrates the spirit of former assistant principal Chris Prewitt, dressed up as a fully funded success. (Info: click here )
Lastly, my dog Murray as a DISH TV satellite dish by wearing the veterinary cone he needed when he had eye surgery a few months ago.
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Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.
Check out my new memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece”
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