Is your Club or Group looking for an inspiring guest speaker or do you want to host a book signing? . . . Contact Woody today!

* * *

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

This and That, and Some Poetry, too

“To begin, begin,” wrote the English poet, William Wordsworth. This seems wise advice for all of us to chase our dreams and passions beginning now.

Endings are also important as Jordan Bohannon of the University of Iowa proved a few days past. The sophomore point guard had made a school record-tying 34 consecutive free throws before clanking the would-be record-breaker off the front of the rim – on purpose.

The reason: he did not want to erase Chris Street’s name from the record book. Street died in a car crash in 1993 while his streak was still ongoing.

“That’s not my record to have,” Bohannon explained. “That record deserves to stay in his name.”

The selfless act brings to mind the name Ralph Waldo Emerson and his words: “What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.”

Despite Millennials frequently being attacked as selfish and coddled and worse, I think Bohannon is a fine example that the right stuff lies inside our youth. Indeed, they are proving so with their #NeverAgain activism following the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Fla.

Speaking of the gun-control debate, my in-box overflowed in support of the need for expanded legislation with only one email parroting the NRA’s status quo. My favorite came from reader Bill Waxman in poetic form:

“From Sandy Hook to Broward County

“Parents again are paying the bounty

“But every time the answer’s the same

“We’ll play the finger pointing game

“And all Congress offers is prayers but no cures

“Because the kids weren’t theirs, they were yours.

“Elected to serve the lobbyist’s greed

“Never mind what the country really needs

“Sitting in their Washington tower

“Slaves to the power of the donated dollar

“Nestled in the pockets of the NRA

“Ignoring the lives that were lost today

“From my cold dead hands, the jingoist screams

“While grieving parents bury their dreams

“The laws of nature have all been shattered

“We forgot to protect what really mattered

“Prayers and condolences ring hollow and fake

“They do nothing to soothe the national ache.

“The debate will turn back to building the wall

“Blind eyes turned to the bodies that fall

“The same spineless group will run in November

“Hoping the rest of us just won’t remember

“Their lack of courage, their lack of cares

“Since the dead were yours, for they weren’t theirs.”

*

Another original poem, a happier haiku, came in my in-box from reader Linda Calderon:

“Sunrise: God peeling

“back night – revealing day’s bloom,

“petal by petal.”

*

Linda’s words bring to mind another quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “If the stars should appear but one night every thousand years how man would marvel and stare.”

In addition to marveling at the peeling back of night, I think we should stare more often at the Pacific sunsets we are so blessed to have with the Channel Islands in the foreground.

*

Let me end with something else of beauty, more than 300 quilts made and collected by the Ventura Modern Quilt Guild, which it is gifting to those affected by the Thomas Fire and Montecito mudslide.

Making this project all the more beautiful, it is not just a local effort: quilts have been donated from 49 states and seven different countries! (To sign up go to: www.Venturamodernquiltguild.com)

The late, great poet Maya Angelou said, “When you leave home, you take home with you.”

To those who lost their homes, a lovely handmade quilt will make their new residences a little more homey.

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon

Is your Club or Group looking for an inspiring guest speaker or do you want to host a book signing? . . . Contact Woody today!

* * *

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

Local Westerns Author Finds Self in Non-Fiction Battle

Western novels do not enjoy the widespread popularity they did in the mid-20th century when Louis L’Amour was riding high in the author saddle. Still, the genre retains a loyal following.

Part of the appeal of “frontier stories,” as L’Amour called them, is they offer an escape from a confusing grey world by providing fictional black-and-white-hat clarity; good guys and bad guys; right versus wrong.

And, of course, frontier stories offer a hero.

Such is the case with “Coyote Courage,” the first in a trilogy – followed by “Coyote Creek” and “Coyote Canyon” – written by Thousand Oaks resident Scott Harris.

The hero in the “Coyote” series is Brock Clemons, the last name being inspired by the author’s admiration for Samuel Clemens, better know by his pen name Mark Twain.

Brock also bears inspiration from Harris, although the author declines any similarities beyond their shared affinity for whiskey and cigars. Because I know Harris as a friend, I know he is being overly modest. He and Brock also share core values of truth and honesty, fair play and chivalry.

Two weeks ago, life imitated art when Harris found himself in a Brock-like plotline. Conejo Valley Unified School District board trustee Mike Dunn sent an email to Harris threatening to harm the reputation of his business, Mustang Marketing, if he did not silence employee Jessica Weihe. As a parent, Weihe has been critical of Dunn.

That has me on the same page with Weihe. I took Dunn to task last July for his role in not approving for the ninth-grade core literature list – thus, effectively banning – Sherman Alexie’s national award-winning young adult novel “The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian,” or PTI for short.

Unbelievably, and irresponsibly, Dunn “banned” (would not approve) PTI despite admitting he had not read it. I did read it and it is terrific and well worthy of high school students’ study and discussion. In Ventura County especially, where we have racial and economic diversity, PTI’s themes are of paramount relevance and importance for our youth.

As for violence and sex – “pornographic” is the word Dunn has employed, and wrongly in disparaging PTI – the novel is tamer than most every prime-time sitcom on network television today. Moreover, every newscast and newspaper features more violence than this novel.

Suggestion: a school district’s “opt-out” policy from reading an assigned novel should include the requirement that one of the student’s parents first read the book – and answer a worksheet to ensure they did – so they do not make such a decision blindly.

Certainly the black-hat-wearing Dunn would have been wise to read “Coyote Courage” before picking a fight with Weihe. Had Dunn done so, he might have anticipated that Weihe’s boss would stand up Brock-like to a bully on her behalf.

Not only in name but also in character is Brock Clemons inspired by Mark Twain, who said: “It is a worthy thing to fight for one’s freedom; it is another to fight for another man’s.”

Brock does just that in “Coyote Courage” where he fights to save the town from outlaws. Importantly, Brock does not do so alone – he rallies the townspeople in Dry Springs to stand up with him.

In Conejo, “Brock” – that is, Scott Harris – fought for the First Amendment. He, too, did not do so alone – he rallied the community. The result this week was the censure of Dunn by the CVUSD board, and by a unanimous 4-0 vote.

By the way, the title of Harris’ debut novel refers to a coyote’s trait of attacking anything that is weaker than it is. Or, if the foe is larger and stronger, coyotes will attack only if they have the adversary greatly outnumbered. Hence, to have the courage of a coyote is to cowardly avoid a fair fight.

Life imitates art: when the fight came Tuesday evening at the school board meeting, Dunn was a no-show.

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon

Is your Club or Group looking for an inspiring guest speaker or do you want to host a book signing? . . . Contact Woody today!

* * *

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

Today’s Column is Overrated (and Underrated)

 My rating of ratings – be they customers on Yelp, consumers on Amazon, movie critics in a newspaper – is that they are overrated.

Nonetheless, I hereby offer a myriad of ratings. Specifically, a list of things that are either “overrated” or “underrated” in my view.

The word “myriad” is underrated and, thus, underused.

Word-of-mouth recommendations are underrated and overrated – it depends on the mouth.

Freedom of speech is underrated.

A free press is likewise underrated until it becomes threatened.

The Super Bowl is overrated, its commercials are overrated, the halftime ceremony is overrated – and yet when friends get together, Super Bowl Sunday as a whole is underrated.

Speaking of friends, a truly good one cannot be overrated.

Speaking of football, it pains me to admit this, but Tom Brady is not overrated.

Being able to turn on your faucet and safely drink the tap water is supremely underrated.

Bottled water is overrated – except when you are in a place where the tap water is unsafe, or simply tastes like minerals.

Libraries – public, school, in one’s home – are underrated.

A walk on the beach, or in the woods, is underrated.

Doctors are generally rated just about right, I believe, but nurses are underrated.

Having a really good dentist is underrated.

TV is overrated, but public television and public radio are underrated.

Children’s laughter cannot be overrated.

The goose-bump thrill of seeing great artwork in person cannot be overrated – a child’s artwork held by a magnet on a refrigerator is likewise underrated.

Having a good mechanic, handyman or plumber is underrated.

Newspapers, be it print or online, are underrated.

Makeup is overrated by a myriad of women.

Holding hands, be it with a boyfriend or girlfriend, with a husband or wife, with a child or the elderly, is underrated.

Independent bookstores, quirky music stores, and cozy coffee shops are underrated.

Indie movies as a whole are overrated, but individually a myriad are underrated.

I always thought firefighters were underrated. After the Thomas Fire, despite their bravery and deeds that have fostered a greater appreciation by the public, I still think these heroes are underrated.

Gift cards are overrated – crisp cash tucked old-school inside a card, like my Aunt Shirley used to do when I was young, is the underrated way to give when you don’t know what to buy.

Theme parks and roller coasters are overrated, but county fairs and Ferris wheels are underrated.

Congress received a 20-percent approval rating in the most recent Gallup poll. In other words, Congress remains overrated.

Email is overused, but underrated.

Handwritten notes, cards and letters sent in the mail cannot be overrated.

The Emmys as a show is overrated. Ditto the Oscars and Golden Globes and the rest.

It seems preposterous, given her record 21 Academy Award nominations, but Meryl Streep might be underrated.

The importance of raw talent is overrated while effort and persistence are underrated.

The value of having music and art education in our schools is grossly underrated.

Flowers in a garden are underrated; vegetable gardens are more underrated; and a blanket of wildflowers in a field even more so.

The durability of today’s tires – on cars and bikes – is underrated, or at least underappreciated.

Fabric softener is overrated.

The importance of the thinness of a smartphone is overrated considering most people add a thicker protective case to it.

Thick towels are underrated.

The value of a compliment is underrated by the giver, but not by the person receiving it.

John Steinbeck is overrated. Just kidding, as I cannot help but return to his work time and again.

Farmer’s markets are greatly underrated.

Strawberries in wintertime – the fresh locally grown fruit, not my book – are underrated.

Thursday’s wee morning rare “Super Blue Blood Moon” lunar eclipse was overrated in the days leading up to it, but proved to be underrated in the moments of its splendor.

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

This, That, and Other iConfessions

It seems there’s a smartphone app for just about everything. For iPhone users, this includes a download approved by the Catholic Church that coaches people through a practice confession of their sins before going to a real confessional booth.

The creators didn’t ask me, but instead of calling it “Confession: A Roman Catholic App” I think they should have dubbed it “iConfess.”

By the way, iConfess I think the app is a waste of $1.99.

*

I am not Catholic, nor do I have a new iPhone X, but iConfess I would probably owe a few Hail Marys penance for my verbal reaction if I did own one and dropped it – seeing as that the repair cost for a broken screen is a whopping $279.

Apple didn’t ask me, but I think it should throw in a free “Confession: A Roman Catholic App” with every iPhone X.

*

iConfess to sometimes cursing poor customer service, including by the U.S. Postal Service, Federal Express and United Parcel Service for committing various sins to letters, magazines and packages.

Fair being fair, I must also praise UPS – specifically, one of its delivery drivers who knocked on my front door at 9 p.m. earlier this week.

It seems a large package for me had erroneously been loaded onto the wrong truck and thus would not get delivered until the following day.

However, when this driver learned about the mistake from his boss, he offered to personally drop the parcel off on his own time on his drive home from work.

By the way, the friendly driver was a millennial – a group that is too often maligned for being self-centered and lazy.

*

Speaking of maligned groups, people often complain about Caltrans for its slow progress on projects or having four people supervising two people who actually appear to be working.

iConfess I have similarly grumbled, but Caltrans merits our deepest thanks and highest praise for the Herculean job its workers did toiling tirelessly around the clock to clear away more than 100,000 cubic yards – 12 feet deep in some places – to reopen Highway 101 in less than two weeks following the monumental mudslides in Montecito.

No one asked me, but I think we all need to keep this in mind the next time roadwork causes traffic to slow to a crawl and has our impatience racing.

*

iConfess to liking most of Kevin Costner’s movies, have loved his performance in a number of them, but the role I most admire him for is as a loyal and generous hometown boy. Very few big-time actors are able to genuinely pull that off.

*

While it is indeed good news, iConfess that we have flat-out gone statistic crazy when The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration reports a new record being set of 246 consecutive days since a person in the U.S. was killed by a tornado.

Hey NOAA, what’s the record for jellyfish stings in the U.S. on a single day? On a Wednesday? On a Wednesday in April?

*

iConfess to being fed up with magazines that use technology to print different covers for newsstands and subscription editions, yet insert two, three, even six annoying new-subscription postcards inside a magazine sent to someone (me) who already subscribes to it.

*

Speaking of print periodicals, my favorite is Patagonia’s catalogue (pronounced “magazine”) as each new edition is filled with stunning outdoor photography as well as well-written feature stories about inspiring people, the environment, travel, wildlife, and more.

*

iConfess to disliking (pronounced “despising”) the New England Patriots.

*

Lastly, iConfess to having no interest in buying an Amazon Alexa that can play music, look up recipes, order groceries, control the thermostat and lock doors, give news and weather updates – including how many consecutive days since a person was killed by a tornado in the U.S. – and more, all by voice command.

Unless, that is, I could say, “Alexa, write next week’s column for me.”

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

Some Books that Knocked Me Out in 2017

My paternal grandfather, Augustus – called Auggie by all – was an executive in the publishing industry for Field Enterprises. Among other tomes, he helped produce the World Book Encyclopedia.

I have no memories of Grandpa Auggie for he died when I was very young. I do, however, have a few letters he wrote my mother. He was a very fine writer and eloquent poet.

I like to think I inherited some of Auggie’s love for the written word and talent with it.

Without question, some tangible things were passed down. Naturally, a complete set of World Book Encyclopedia was always on the bookshelves of my youth. Oh my, how many school reports I used those A-through-Z volumes for in the pre-Internet age!

Countless other books that Auggie brought home from work – the way, I suppose, a butcher brings home cuts of meat – lined our family bookcases. Twain and Shakespeare, not surprisingly, but also glossy children’s picture books and travel volumes from around the globe. Many of them were special-edition, leather-bound volumes.

Up in flames these heirloom books went when the Thomas Fire burned down my boyhood home, the home my father had lived in for 44 years and still did. Auggie’s books filled the study, a lovely room with ten-foot-high, ceiling-to-floor bookcases on two walls; shelves that took Pop and me two weekends to repaint one long-ago summer.

The Thomas Fire also seemed to consume something else, something less important – my eighth annual column recommending some favorites from my book-a-week reading list during the year. However, because so many requests came in, belatedly here goes.

“Hemingway in Love: His Own Story” by A.E. Hotchner. In addition to Hemingway’s two great romantic loves, this is memoir is about Papa’s friendship with the author.

Plays aren’t usually as “readable” as novels, but “The Moon is Down” by John Steinbeck proves an exception.

“Tears We Cannot Stop: A Sermon to White America” by Michael Eric Dyson is compelling and insightful from start to finish.

“Barbarian Days: A Surfing Life” by William Finnegan. One need not be a surfer to be captivated by this Pulitzer Prize-winning storytelling.

Another Pulitzer Prize honoree, “The Underground Railroad” by Colson Whitehead, is one of the most emotionally powerful novels I have read, ever.

“Lincoln at the Bardo: A Novel” by George Saunders. Readers will either love or loathe this unique offering – I, the former, and greatly.

“Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit” by Michael Finkel. A nearly unbelievable true story, well told.

I found the new tome “Leonardo da Vinci” by Walter Isaacson underwhelming because it overwhelmed me with too much redundancy and made me wish the author had taken the time to pare its 624 pages in half. David McCullough, meanwhile, tells “The Wright Brothers” story marvelously and fully in 336 pages. I finished rereading this text while watching – and marveling at what Orville and Wilburn might think – jet airlines takeoff and land at LAX.

“We Stood Upon Stars: Finding God in Lost Places” by Venturan Roger Thompson, who weaves together a tapestry of fatherhood and travel, religion and also humor.

“The Journal Entries of an Addict” by Camarillo’s Stephen Michael Jester, II, is a collection of 365 haiku poems. I must add the disclosure that I am honored to be mentioned on the dedication page as “friend, mentor and fellow author.”

“Max Perkins Editor of Genius” by A. Scott Berg. Perkins was the literary agent of F. Scott Fitzgerald and Thomas Wolfe, among others, and thus this book segues nicely to the final pages I read in 2017, “My Salinger Year” by Joanna Rakoff.

This memoir about Rankoff’s experiences as an editorial assistant to the woman who represented the reclusive J.D. Salinger was all the more enjoyable for me because it takes place in the old-school publishing world Grandpa Auggie inhabited, with typewriters and Dictaphones, message couriers and martini lunch meetings.

To paraphrase Holden Caulfield in Salinger’s “The Catcher in the Rye,” these are some of the books that knocked me out last year.

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon

For a Personalized Autographed copy of “STRAWBERRIES IN WINTERTIME” or “WOODEN & ME” mail a check for $25 to:

Woody Woodburn

400 Roosevelt Court

Ventura, CA 93003

* * *

Mailbag is Filled With Reasons to Smile

As a rule, a columnist needs the hide of an alligator but happily over the past few weeks all the reader emails I have received have given me a toothy grin.

I hope a sampling will likewise brighten your day . . .

*

Rick Throckmorton agreed with my column about firefighters being true heroes:

“They are the unsung who go about their work without much notice or, unfortunately, admiration. Unnoticed, that is, until the flames are licking at the back door!

“I’ve been in the helicopter business for many, many years and have fought my share of fires. But time has caught up with me and I now watch from a distance and marvel at these guys – the next generation to replace us old ’Nam Vets.

“Fire is very similar to combat, except hopefully no one is shooting at you. The dangers exist on every flight from high winds and turbulence, low visibility in the smoke and flames, and even the possibility of running into the unseen drone – yet, these guys still go out and do battle with the Enemy: Fire and Flames.”

*

Bob Nieto also praised firefighters:

“As a 45.5-year law enforcement officer (retired), I can mirror your thoughts and words regarding these true heroes. On many occasions, I have been alongside and worked with these courageous men and women.

“Firefighters and police are made like all others, who feel, hurt, cry, love and morn losses of life and work for the people of their community and state. They do it with honor and integrity.”

*

Linda Calderon shared an original brief poem: “Sunrise: God peeling back night – revealing day’s bloom, petal by petal.”

*

My friend John Watts, meanwhile, shared a story that his own friend, Peter, shared with him.

Stealing baby Jesus from the life-sized crèche had become an unwelcomed holiday tradition at the church Peter served as minister.

One year, however, instead of a theft there was a small gift left beside the infant with a hand-written label that read: “Happy Brithday, Jesus.”  Birthday was misspelled.

Curiosity got the best of Peter and he opened the red wrapping paper. Inside an old Shake ‘n Bake pork seasoning box was 33 cents – and a note on lined school paper reading:

“Dear Jesus, Happy Brithday. Here’s some small change for you to feed someone who is hungry. I give myself to be kind to others as you were kind to other people on earth. Love, Maria.”

Peter knew right away who Maria was for she lived on the church campus in the house it operated for people with chronic mental illness. She was, Peter recalls, “a tender soul” with a “big heart” who was “plagued by schizophrenia.”

“For 25 years now, I’ve kept that box and note and the change inside,” Peter says. “It sits in my desk drawer as a sacred relic of sorts, something I’m unwilling to part with. It may have been intended for Jesus, but it keeps on giving a beautiful reminder to me: Love is the best thing I have to give away.”

*

Speaking of love and giving, the final tally announced here previously for this year’s Woody’s Holiday Ball Drive needs updating after a number of last-minute donations rolled in, including: Stacy DeLeon, and Sheila and Tom McCollum, with ten basketballs between them; and Jim Cowan with 10 more “in honor of the firefighters and policemen that saved so many homes from being lost!”

A reader, who wished to remain anonymous, also donated 10 basketballs after finally returning to his home following a long evacuation due to the Thomas Fire. He noted:

“I’m just trying to contribute to something that is so worthwhile. I think, in the back of my mind somewhere, is the hope that if he had known about even the truly small effort I’ve made to your Ball Drive, Coach John Wooden would have said something like, ‘Good job!’”

I’m confident Coach would have indeed praised everyone who contributed to this year’s drive that totaled 358 balls for kids in need.

* * *

Woody Woodburn writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com.

Check out my memoir WOODEN & ME: Life Lessons from My Two-Decade Friendship with the Legendary Coach and Humanitarian to Help “Make Each Day Your Masterpiece” and my essay collection “Strawberries in Wintertime: Essays on Life, Love, and Laughter” …

• Personalized signed copies are available at WoodyWoodburn.com
• Unsigned paperbacks or Kindle ebook can be purchased here at Amazon