Tears and Smiles Share Same Date

Today’s calendar page, January 26, plays Ping Pong with my emotions—tears doink-plunk! smile doink-plunk! heartbreak doinkplunk! joy.

Indeed, this date, more than any other of the year, in my family holds a story seemingly written in the stars and typed by the fingers of Fate. Coincidence alone seems overmatched in explaining it.

Coincidence, defined as “the occurrence of events that happen at the same time by accident but seem to have some connection,” is my sharing a birth date with my wife’s grandfather or my son and my daughter’s youngest daughter sharing their birthday. The odds are only 1-in-366 against these horoscopic connections.

Coincidence, mixed with healing serendipity, was my first grandchild being born on the one-year anniversary of the night, nearly the very hour, that the Thomas Fire razed my childhood home. For my father especially, who had still lived in the house, a date of gloom was turned into one of bloom in celebrating the birth of his newest great-granddaughter.

Multiple memorable events and coincidental anniversaries happen every day of the year, of course, which is why The Star and most newspapers run daily “On This Date In History” summaries. A January 26th coincidence, for example, is Michigan becoming a state (1837), Louisiana seceding from the Union (1861), and Virginia rejoining the Union (1870).

January 26, however, has surpassed coincidence for my loved ones and me.

Shuffling the chronological order, let me begin with “On This Date” in 2003 when a drunk driver speeding down a city street at 70 mph rear-ended me as I was stopped at a red light. My life, fast as a finger snap, was forever changed as I suffered a ruptured disc in my neck causing permanent nerve damage in my left arm, hand and fingers.

Still, it was not fully a tragedy. Fate, after cruelly cursing me, then smiled sympathetically and let me somehow walk away from a hunk of twisted steel and shattered glass that had seconds earlier been a Honda Civic. Indeed, two police officers at the scene told me they could not believe I survived.

The 26th of January 2015 offered no such blessed fortune for one of my daughter’s dearest friends. In India for a wedding, Celiné and her younger brother were passengers in a taxi when it was broadsided by a city bus. The brother walked away, the big sister did not, her 26-year-old life extinguished in a blink’s instant.

Two crashes on the same date can be brushed off as tearful coincidence. But there are three smiles, too. On January 26, five years before my car crash, my lovely niece Arianna was born; ten years ago, exactly one year before Celiné’s deathly accident, my daughter met her husband; and five years ago, another January 26th love story, when Holly, a college roommate and third “sister” with my daughter and Celiné, received a marriage proposal.

Holly’s fiancé, now her husband for she enthusiastically said “yes!” when he got down on bended knee, says he did not purposely choose the date for its significance in an effort to magically metamorphose an anniversary of sorrow into one with a measure of joy.

And yet it is possible that Justin’s subconscious helped guide him to the fateful date. Or, perhaps, January 26 magically chose the couple that is now a happy family of three.

I like to think the latter. As Mr. Hemingway wrote in the closing line of dialogue in his novel “The Sun Also Rises,” spoken in—oh, Celiné—a taxi:

“ ‘Isn’t it pretty to think so?’ ”

Yes, it is.

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Two Love Stories Sweet as Jelly

February is just around the corner, and with it Valentine’s Day, which made me think of “The Shop Around the Corner,” the 1940 romantic comedy starring Jimmy Stewart and Margaret Sullavan, which of course brought to mind “You’ve Got Mail,” the 1998 remake with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, which also reminded me of meet cutes.

Like baseball cards in my boyhood, I now collect stories from couples of how they met. Here are two recent additions, the first prompted when my friend Wayne Kempton mentioned he and his bride were going to celebrate their wedding anniversary with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

PB&J? Not caviar and lobster and local strawberries dipped in gourmet chocolate? There had to be a story, and a good one, so I asked and Wayne answered thusly…

“Shari and I eloped with a deep love, but very little earthly wealth. We had her ’59 Mercury convertible, one suitcase and two tennis rackets. And very little money. So, we economized en route, buying a loaf a bread, a jar of peanut butter and some cheese puffs that served as meals—many picnics, actually—on our way from Iowa to California.

“Each year since, we have celebrated August 29th with a feast of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and cheese puffs. And champagne—we were not only broke, but also too young for wine then!”

Instead of in a bookstore around the corner, they had met in a grocery store where they both worked.

“It was in September 1966,” Wayne says, reaching back. “We were beginning our senior year, and I was the new guy at school. We became high school sweethearts and got engaged a year later on our first day of college. Our plan was to get married after finishing college, but we eloped a year later. We eloped because both sets of parents were dead set against us even seeing each other.”

Their parents proved as wrong as pickles on a PB&J sandwich, for Wayne and Shari have now gone through, at 26 slices in an typical loaf of bread, more than four loaves and quite a few jars of jelly and peanut butter with 55 anniversary feasts to date.

Earlier this month my friend Rick Estberg shared his own “Shop Around the Corner” love story in screenplay form…

“On this exact date, 44 years ago, a young man sat next to a young woman in a very attractive green dress. It was their first day on new jobs at their Agency. Soon they dated. And then they became lovers. And eventually they got married. For years they would joke about that accidental first meeting and the dress, which perhaps magically brought them together on Day One.

“About 40 years later the young woman, now not so young anymore, grew very ill. The young man, now not so young anymore, was beside himself, being unable to make things right again.

“Then, a year ago, the old woman died. And the old man cried himself to sleep. That night he had a dream. A dream about a wonderful and lovely young woman in a very attractive green dress. And for as long as that dream lasted the old man was happy once again, reveling in the magic that she brought to him. And the world. Which leads to the following mythical exchange:

“ ‘I don’t believe in magic,’ said a young man one day, very self-assuredly.

“The old man, with a small tear in his eye, replied thoughtfully, ‘Ah, but you will one day—when you finally meet her.’ ”

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

New Postage Stamp Priceless (to me)

In just over one week’s time, on Jan. 21 to be precise, U.S. Postal Service first-class postage for a one-ounce letter will rise two pennies to 68 cents.

My two cents on the rate increase is that it remains a minor miracle, and a major bargain, to have a letter delivered from sea to shining sea, and anywhere between, in only a few days for such a price.

Considering the Pony Express charged five dollars in 1860 for a half-ounce letter, the equivalent to $191 in 2024, 68 cents seems a steal indeed.

Moreover, while the Pony Express was Hermes-like speedy, employing a relay system of fresh wing-footed horses and tireless riders to deliver mail from Missouri to California, a distance of nearly 2,000 miles, as quickly as 10 days, today’s mail travels by Jet Engine 30,000 Horsepower Express.

Along with the postage hike, two recent news items put stamps on my mind. The first was the auction sale of an “Inverted Jenny”—a 24-cent stamp issued in 1918 of which 100 were erroneously printed with the blue image of a biplane upside-down framed by a background of red—for more than $2 million.

More priceless to me personally, however, was the announcement a few days later that the USPS will release early this year a limited-edition first-class Forever Stamp honoring my hero and friend, the late and legendary UCLA basketball coach John Wooden.

Thorough thought went into the stamp’s design. In addition to featuring a head-and-shoulders portrait of Wooden from his coaching days, wearing black-framed glasses and a suit and tie and also wearing a game-face countenance, the background has two generic players—a jump shooter in a white No. 4 jersey and a No. 10 defender in black, the latter being the number of national championships Wooden’s Bruins won during his 27-years in Westwood and the former being the number of undefeated seasons they enjoyed. Additionally, “John” appears in blue and “Wooden” in gold, these being UCLA’s school colors.

It is further worth noting that Wooden, who passed away at age 99 in 2010, becomes only the second basketball coach thusly honored, the first being James Naismith in 1961. This is a rarefied pair as high-flying as an Inverted Jenny—the man who invented the game and the coach who perfected it.

Having been fortunate, blessed beyond measure in truth, to have enjoyed a 20-year friendship with Coach Wooden, here is one of my memories, a collage actually: every time I visited him in his home there would be two plastic tubs from the post office, each about the size and shape of a laundry basket, one brimming with incoming fan mail, the other filled with outgoing replies.

Many fans requested an autographed photograph or copy of his famous Pyramid of Success while others sent magazine covers, trading cards, jerseys, even basketballs for him to sign and send back.

Remarkably, and quite thoughtlessly, rarely was return postage included. No matter, Coach Wooden cheerfully packaged the items up, carted them to the post office and paid the postage himself. Week after month after year, this surely added up to a princely sum, but he was a prince of a man. As he said a million times, “You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.” John Wooden, who walked four miles each morning, also walked his talk.

An estimated 18 million Wooden stamps are set to be issued and I personally plan to buy enough to mail a heaping laundry basket worth of letters.

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.

Tally of Kindness Merits an Update

Two weeks ago, I gratefully announced the final tally of “Woody’s Holiday Ball Drive” to be a record by more than 100, but it turns out a few smile-givers slipped through the cracks uncounted and I would like to acknowledge them now…

Kids giving to kids always puts birdsong in my heart, so one of my favorite 2023 MVPs (Most Valuable Philanthropists) is Rayo Arriaga Gladish. Great-grandson of Arlys Tuttle, who passed away late last year at age 101, 12-year-old Rayo took the lead for the entire Tuttle family and donated 13 balls – plus two scholarships for the Ventura Youth Basketball Association, which has special meaning since his great-grandfather and husband of Arlys, legendary Ventura High School basketball coach Bob Tuttle, created the VYBA long ago.

“We will be missing my great-grandma this Christmas,” Rayo shared, “and hope to be part of bringing happiness and sports to kids in her memory and spirit.”

In addition to Rayo, thanks goes to Andrea Arriaga, Raymundo and Trudy Arriaga, Toni and Jaime Santana, Gayle and Leo Camalich, Gary Tuttle and Ruth Vomund, Erica and Mark Herring, Carly and Jared Wilson, Mary Antoci, Geoffrey Quemuel, Monica Ruiz and Mark Etchings, Summer Helms, Matt and Aimee Pesendian, and Mary Osborne and Lance Gilbert.

Meanwhile, Matt and Michelle Demaria gave a dozen combined basketballs, soccer balls and footballs; and Linda Peddie, with a shopping assist from her husband Jim while she was battling COVID-19, added four more.

All of which adds up to a revised final count of 1,171 children’s smiles handed out these past holidays.

Meanwhile, I keep thinking about 12 smiles handed out by Steve Askay, a former teacher of both my kids in high school. More especially, I cannot forget the tears in my heart over his donation being in memory of his “beautiful granddaughter Mabel Rae Askay.”

Beautiful is a grand understatement, as evidence by the photographs Steve shared with me. If Hollywood had a casting call for a 6-year-old cherub, Irish as Guinness with long curls the color of a shiny penny, a smile as bright as a full moon, and blue eyes that fairly twinkle, the part would have gone to Mabel with no others needing to audition.

Tragically, the Ventura girl died two summer ago, just weeks after finishing kindergarten, when, in an unbelievably freak accident, she fell off a float during a Fourth of July parade in Mandan, North Dakota, where her family was visiting relatives.

From the cloudburst of tears, remarkably, a Rae of sunshine emerged. For the past two years, her Dec. 10 birth date has been “Mabel Rae’s Day of Kindness” where people have been encouraged to do acts of “extravagant love, kindness and generosity.” There is even a “mabel-ray-shines-on” Instagram account.

Here is the kind of shining girl she was, as shared in her obituary: “Mabel Rae Askay lived her life like a red-haired tornado that fiercely loved everyone she ever came across. She never met anyone, or any of God’s creatures, that she couldn’t be friends with.”

Lynn Bova, Mabel’s kindergarten teacher, echoed this in The Star at the time: “You must imagine the warmth of the sun when she skips into the room. The joy in her sparkly blue eyes, her kindness as she rescues a lost spider or bug that found its way into our classroom, the silliness of her green tongue after enjoying a popsicle, and the love she shared with everyone she met.”

December 10 is a long way off – how much better if we treat every day like Mabel Rae’s Day of Kindness.

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Essay copyrights Woody Woodburn

Woody writes a weekly column for The Ventura County Star and can be contacted at WoodyWriter@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter and Instagram at @woodywoodburn. His SIGNED books are available at www.WoodyWoodburn.com.